Communication is key in any relationship, and in the digital age, a lot of that communication happens over text. However, not all texts are created equal. Some can boost attraction, while others can kill it quicker than a bad first date. Learning the do’s and don’ts of text flirting is crucial if you want to keep the spark alive and your partner interested. To help you do just that, we’ve compiled a list of texts that can tank attraction, along with suggestions for what to send instead.

1. The “K” Text

You’ve probably been on the receiving end of this one-word text that can feel like a slap in the face. It’s dismissive, conversation-ending, and generally a mood killer.

Instead of “K,” try to show that you’re engaged in the conversation. Acknowledge what the other person said and add something to it. For instance, if they’re telling you about their day, you could respond with “That sounds really interesting! Tell me more about it.” This shows that you’re interested in what they have to say and are willing to keep the conversation going.

2. The Double (Or Triple) Text

We all know the anxiety that comes with waiting for a response, but sending multiple texts in a row can come off as needy and desperate.

Instead of sending multiple texts, give your partner some time to respond. If they’re busy, they might not have time to respond right away. If you need to add something to your previous text, wait a bit before sending it. This gives them a chance to respond and keeps the conversation balanced.

3. The Overly Sexual Text

While it’s completely okay and healthy to express sexual interest in your partner, doing it too soon or too often can come off as crass or disrespectful.

Instead, try to build a connection on a deeper level first. Compliment their intelligence, sense of humor, or kindness. This shows that you value them as a person and not just as a sexual object.

4. The Negging Text

Negging is a manipulative tactic used to undermine someone’s confidence in order to make them more receptive to advances. It’s disrespectful and can seriously harm the attraction.

Instead of negging, try genuine compliments. Everyone loves to feel appreciated and valued, and sincere compliments can go a long way in building attraction.

5. The Ghosting Text

Ghosting, or abruptly ending a conversation without explanation, can leave the other person feeling confused and hurt.

Instead of ghosting, if you need to end a conversation, do it politely. A simple “I have to go, but let’s talk later!” can suffice.

6. The Overly Formal Text

While it’s important to be respectful, overly formal texts can come off as stiff and unapproachable.

Instead, try to adopt a more casual and friendly tone. Use emojis and exclamation marks to convey your feelings and make your texts more engaging.

7. The Bland Text

Bland texts lack personality and can make conversations feel dull and uninteresting.

Instead, try to inject some humor or personal anecdotes into your texts. This can make conversations more lively and enjoyable.

8. The Excessive Emoji Text

While emojis can help convey feelings, using them excessively can make your texts seem childish and immature.

Instead of using too many emojis, try to express your feelings in words. This can make your texts more meaningful and heartfelt.

9. The Late Night Text

Late-night texts can be seen as disrespectful, especially if they interrupt the other person’s sleep.

Instead, try to respect the other person’s time. If it’s late and you want to talk, consider sending a text the next morning instead.

10. The Misunderstood Text

Texts can easily be misunderstood due to the lack of tone and context.

Instead of relying solely on texts, consider calling or meeting in person to discuss important matters. This can help avoid misunderstandings and improve communication.